This is what a Lutheran envisions when told to "make sauce".
(image: sordo.com)
"I don't know how to make sauce!"
This was the only defense the Countess could offer when confronted by her friend Angela, who regarded the jar of Newman's Own on the Countess' counter with a look of exasperation and pity. She was having none of it.
"Whadda ya mean? Sauce is easy."
"I'M NOT ITALIAN!!"
It's true, the Royal Family has not a speck of Italian blood. The Count is a Swede through and through. The Countess is a heady mixture of Scotch-Irish, English, and German. They are why God gave us sunscreen.
The very idea of making ones own sauce conjured images of dark eyed Italian women tending over a secret concoctions passed down through generations, blessed by Father Michael, and prepared under the watchful eye of a housecoat clad, heavily accented Grandma.
"How do you make sauce?" The Countess asked.
"You know, couple of cloves of garlic, some tomatoes.....it's nothing....this is just stupid", Angela said as she waved her arms in the general direction of the offending sauce. And then she shrugged.
With little to go on, the hunt began for the Royal Sauce. There were contenders aplenty, but these stood out.
Ina Garten - tomato, onion, garlic, and a healthy bit of red wine.
Giada De Laurentis - Celery, carrots, onions, garlic, bay leaves.
Mark Bittman - Olive oil, onions, parsley or basil.
Marcella Hazan - Butter, Onion.
The Kingdom sampled all, and all are worth trying. But ultimately it was Marcella Hazan's bright, intense, insanely easy, three ingredient sauce that won the hearts of the Kingdom and became the Royal Sauce.
Three ingredients. An honest 2-5 minutes of prep with 45 minutes of cooking.
While it seems ridiculous to actually write this out as a recipe Ms. Hazan's bit of culinary genius has surely earned the proper treatment.
Tomato Sauce with Butter and Onions
Adapted from Marcela Hazan’s Essentials of Italian Cooking
1 28-ounce can of whole peeled tomatoes, or crushed tomatoes. (San Marzano, if you can find them)
5 tablespoons of unsalted butter
1 medium-sized yellow onion, peeled and halved
Salt to taste
Put the tomatoes, onion and butter in a heavy saucepan (3 quart size is ideal) on medium heat. Bring the sauce to a simmer then lower the heat to keep the sauce at a slow, steady simmer for about 45 minutes, or until droplets of fat float free of the tomatoes. Stir occasionally, crushing the tomatoes against the side of the pot with a wooden spoon. Remove from heat, discard the onion, add salt to taste.
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